fact

This entry isn't gonna be rainbows and chocolate chips. So if you dont relly wanna hear any kinda angst talk, i recommend to not to read this one.



I'm gonna talk about one thing now, so people understand fre things better about me.
The way i act in con's(happy, adhd everywhere and talkking to all) is because at home i'm so freaking lonely! I live with my mom still, because i cant go just like that. I have to have place to go, job or even school. And i dont have neither of those. I'm not working and i'm not in school, but i sure hope i was.

I dont relly have friends in Vaasa. Few yes, but they have work, school or theyr boyfriends, so we dont see each other often. Maybe if i'm lucky 3 times a month. Usually once. There are others too ofcourse, but busy and always going. They seem to have theyr own group. They known each other many many yers, so i understand that. And i'm kinda used to hear words like "i have work" etc. So in one point i stop asking them out. Even thou i miss them. But i'm just thired hearing it. And it gets me relly sad to hear it. So i quess i'm waiting to someone to ask me.

Ofcourse i have friends outside the Vaasa where i live. But indeed...outside..the..vaasa. Far away. I have two friends who talk to me almost everyday. Even call me. Other is Aino, from tampere and other is marika. Who lives all the way kemi! And then i have other relly good friends in ähtäri, Kouvola.......pretty much all the way finland. I'm happy i have that kinda friend. I love them all. Even those who i yet know that well, i love them.

So what i'm relly talking here is..Well, some peopel think i'm wannabee-epic-cosplayer that everyone knows about. I dont care about if someone thinks about that, but the truth is i act like that in cons only because iäm so happy if ANYONE talks to me and ask picture. it makes me feel i'm alive and free. I meet all my friends at the same time. It's like a freaking party! Ofcurse there is some sad moments as well, but pretty much it's all good. So good it makes me cry right now too. I miss that feeling.


I have nothing to do in whole month. Sitting front of computer...eating and..yeah. Thats about it. I just wish i would have that kind amoney to go see someone, or they would come here.


xoxo

Ane